If you ask your child why they like to play video games they will likely tell you that they do so because its fun or it helps them to relax. I hope that most parents can appreciate the value of this – your child deserves to have fun and to have a chance to relax.  

Moderation is the key to success with this. Too much of a good thing can easily become a bad thing. I don’t advocate an abstinence approach to screen or gaming time, the reason why is that your child is going to eventually be exposed to electronics and there is value in them learning structure and discipline around digital consumption.

But, as a parent you may have heard horror stories about children becoming addicted to video games, becoming overweight from sitting on the couch all the time when playing or even becoming aggressive in some cases. It is often underappreciated, but make sure that your child is making good choices as far as the content they are accessing and pay attention to the ratings (I cannot stress the ESRB ratings enough).  

Today, I’m not going to talk about those negative aspects of video game play. Instead, I’d like to give you a more broad perspective on the role of video games in your child’s life. Today we’re talking about the positives of video game play. Below are potentially positive aspects that may occur naturally through your child’s play or maybe intentionally incubated by parents and family members.

***A side note:

Before we begin, I want to emphasize that there is a difference between potentially useful, high-quality games, and video games that are inappropriate for your child. You should always be aware of the content of your child’s video games and I’d like to point to commonsense.org as a resource to quickly educate yourself about the content and quality of each game your child owns. There is very little to no evidence (good evidence, scientifically gathered and analyzed) that long term video game use can result in a person enacting violence. However, there is some evidence that video game play, in some situations, can result in short term irritability and impulse control. I may address this topic in a future blog post if people are interested and have questions about this.

So how can gameplay enrich and develop our children into healthy, creative, and social adults?

—

—

1. Behavioral Currency

What is behavioral Currency? Very simply, it’s whatever you need to use to get your child to do what you want them to do. 

Everyone needs the motivation to get things done, would you go to work if you didn’t get a paycheck? This should be something positive for them that you can let them earn as a reward. This doesn’t have to be limited to video games but can include youtube, web surfing time, or phone time. It is very important to set an expectation and reward to motivate your child to follow through at an early age before they are old enough to learn the virtue of responsibility.

2. Problem-solving skills

What your children love about video games is the sense of accomplishment they get from figuring out the challenges placed in those games. From getting to the next level to beating a really hard boss, there are always problems to solve. I always think of video games as a very good looking series of puzzles. Each player is tasked to figure out how to either beat the game or beat another player. 

3. Learning to not give up

Sometimes those challenges result in your child losing at the game. Hopefully, your child isn’t getting so upset that they throw their controller, but children learn that if they want to get to the next level, they will have to figure out what they did wrong and adapt. In video games, your child has an opportunity to try something, fail, then try it again. This teaches them an invaluable lesson and instills in them an important value, RESILIENCE.  

4. Achievement and Confidence

For the average child growing up in the USA, there is a phenomenal amount of pressure to do great. Kids are sometimes unfairly judged against one another in the school system, they measure themselves against peers on social media, and even with the best of intentions parents will sometimes measure them against their siblings. In video games, a child can play through from beginning to end and feel a sense of accomplishment. In player vs. player games, they can experience their skill as a player increase and get a sense of satisfaction that way. A player also gets a chance to learn to be humble in defeat, and since video games are fun its likely they will pick the controller back up and play again – a skill which can translate to their real lives. 

5. Creativity

A lot of popular games these days foster the development of creativity. Sometimes this takes place as part of the game, sometimes creativity allows people to win in a unique way, and sometimes gaming sparks a child’s imagination. There are a plethora of examples of creativity in games like Minecraft where players have built cities, monuments, and replicas of real-life objects. In games like Roblox, there are several user-generated game modes and scenarios – many of which made by children and shared with the gaming community. This creativity isn’t limited to in-game either, I often have patients of mine come to the clinic and show me drawings of their favorite video game characters. A study published in PNAS showed that Individuals with a creative brain show a distinct pattern of activity across three brain networks: the default mode network, the salience network, and the executive control network. Furthermore, those brain regions work together in a synchronized manner which fosters creative thought. (https://www.forbes.com/sites/daviddisalvo/2018/01/19/study-shows-how-the-creative-brain-is-wired-differently/#7a3c19c231a0)

6. Exploration

Some games rely on the player taking a linear path whereas others allow the player to chose the path that they want to take. Young children love to explore and discover new things in their environment, and this fosters an experiential type of learning that isn’t replicated in our standard public classrooms. I would say that you should take advantage of every clear weathered day and free moment to bring your child outdoors for explorative play, but unfortunately, there are limits on our time. Certain video games can be useful emulate outdoor exploration.

7. Cooperation

Cooperation with others to complete a common task is an essential skill to be successful in many online video games as it is in the real world. Many popular games require teamwork, communication, assignment of roles, and leadership. Through video gameplay, many children learn that to be successful, they must work with others to accomplish something they wouldn’t be able to do on their own.

8. Socializing

Many children socialize through video games and various forms of social media. Most children use gaming as a means to strengthen established friendships. In their teen years, children often practice self-disclosure to their peers which improve social connectedness, problem-solving, and potentially, empathy. It is important to talk to your children about what is appropriate and what is not appropriate forms of communication through video games or other online media. It is a good idea to educate your child to understand that what they say or post online is not as anonymous or impermanent as they may think.

How do you use video gaming and digital content to help your child develop?  

Please leave me a comment if you would like me to write a post about popular games that can help with your child’s development in some way.  Also, contact me if you are interested in me working with you or your child — I am a Child and Adolescent Psychiatrist in Pasadena, CA and Sherman Oaks, CA. I specialize in difficulties including ADHD, Anxiety, Depression, OCD, as well as transitional life issues.

Subscribe to my mailing list to be notified when I write a new post and to get a free ebook for offline activities to develop those other skills. Just click the image below for a free Ebook “7 Days of Un-Video Game Play”.